Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
