So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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