It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
