can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
