Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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