ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
