Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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