they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize