Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
