Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
