i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
