I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize