so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
