Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
