its not stalking. its research.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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