Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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