I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
We are all done wearing pants today
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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