hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
