just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
