at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
