O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
