The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
