Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
