Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
