dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
