i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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