No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize