I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize