Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
