Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
be right there i have to get my cape
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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