Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize