So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
