what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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