You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
