I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
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