not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
