Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize