Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Randomize
