umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
