I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
