that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
