At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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