The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize