My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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