it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I want her autograph on my taint
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
