? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
