Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
