Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
