Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Someone signed my nipple.
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