forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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